My Son's Wedding - What a Wonderful Day!

Never have I cried so much, laughed so hard, danced so madly or felt so proud. So many emotions. So much love. So much fun. Such a wonderful day. Surrounded by most of my favourite people in the world.

My brave, amazing son defeated the odds to be on his feet at his wedding. His strength and determination allowing him to stand, to declare his love for his beautiful bride in front of family and friends,  just three weeks after major surgery to remove the cancer that had turned all of our lives upside down. Supported by a crutch and with support from his wife to be, Joe said his vows and married his soulmate, his rock and his first love Jade.

With my gorgeous grandson Ted stealing the show, and with my five beautiful children making me the proudest I have ever been, this wedding gave us all a chance to celebrate something joyous together. After so many months of uncertainty, we were able to simply focus on the positives. Something we all very much needed. 

Joe and Jade have become the new Mr and Mrs McDonald. I hope that they are going to enjoy the title and their married life as much as Ian and I have over the years. With all they have been through together already, I know their relationship is solid and their love for each other is strong.

The security, the companionship, the love, the support, the feeling of being a part of something greater than the sum of its parts - a good, strong, happy marriage is truly a blessing.  I wish my son and my new daughter-in-law a long, healthy and happy life together.

How can my oldest child be 27?

Twenty seven years ago I had my first child. Twenty seven years? How is that even possible?

I remember being 27 myself. It doesn't seem that long ago and yet now my son Joe is that age. 27? That is nearly 30. If my baby boy is nearly 30 then I must be pushing 50! Half a century! How has that come around so fast? Surely 1988 wasn't that long ago?

I remember becoming a mum to Joe like it was yesterday. A terrified teenager. A baby that changed everything for the better. We embarked on an adventure together. Just me and him. The two of us. Mother and son against the world. We did OK!

Time kept creeping on. Birthdays were celebrated, years passed by.

Along the way, our lives were blessed with the arrival of our knight in shining armour, Ian who made everything complete, safe, secure and happier than we could ever have imagined, and with four further beautiful babies to add to the brood. Our little tiny family of two swelled to become a family of seven. A fabulous, loud, proud, chaotic, slightly bonkers and absolutely perfect family.

Tick tock. Time continued to pass. My babies grew up under my watchful eye, surrounded by my constant love. Little boys grow into men. They get tall, they start to shave, they get a job, they spread their wings.

Now my son has his own life. A life he has created for himself. A life that makes me so proud of him. He is a wonderful daddy to my gorgeous grandson Ted. I'm not just mum anymore - I'm Nana Wendy now too. Joe gave me that gift.

We've grown older alongside each other for 27 years. Things have changed but the love I felt for that tiny baby I delivered all those years ago has not diminished one little bit. He's always my baby boy - but my baby boy is now a man. A 27 year old man. I'm a much older woman than I was 27 years ago, but my life has been made richer every single day since becoming a mother. 27 years of unconditional love has made me who I am today. Shaped me into someone I am proud to be. And it all started with the birth of my son. My son who is 27 today.

 Happy birthday son xxx

Happy Birthday Megan - My Inspirational Daughter

Today, 23 years ago, I gave birth to my eldest daughter Megan.  My pregnancy was not easy.  I suffered from pre-eclampsia and was hospitalised several times.  At one point, a routine ante-natal appointment ended up with an emergency trip to hospital, because they couldn't find her heartbeat.  I was warned to fear the worst, and I went over and over in my head how I was going to explain to my three year old son, that his long awaited baby sister wouldn't be coming home.  But my beautiful baby was a determined, feisty and tenacious girl with a strong will to make it into this world alive and kicking.  And that she did.  Her determination, feistiness and tenacity have remained defining characteristics of her personality ever since.

Over the years, Megan has proved her strength of character and her determination to succeed over and over again.  At school, her hard working attitude and intelligence was recognised from an early age and resulted in her going up to secondary school when she was still only 10 years old.

University followed when she was just 17 studying Business and Management, and at just 20 years old she started an independent life living in Manchester, putting her degree to good use.

Megan applies the same positive attitude to her personal life and embraces every opportunity to get out there, have fun and experience new things with gusto, while her working life shows that she is a force to be reckoned with, and proves that she has no fear when it comes to pursuing her dreams.  She is such a people person with so much confidence that nothing holds her back when it comes to working a room or meeting a client. Whatever Megan does, she goes big!

My daughter is an absolute inspiration to me.  She personifies everything I always aspired to be, and is living the sort of life I dreamed of when I was younger.  My life took a very different path, but I do not regret the fact that I didn't get to embrace opportunities like she does.  My path lead to early motherhood and the honour of parenting my five wonderful children. Helping them to grow and flourish has been the role that has defined me through my adult life.

Being Megan's mum is something I am so incredibly proud of.  Watching her succeed and live such a full and exciting life brings me so much happiness. Knowing I helped her to get there is just so humbling and brings meaning to the choices I made when I was her age and pregnant with her.

I love hearing her stories, such as the one where she had some cheeky banter with John Hurt on the set of the film she helped produce or where she turned down the chance to date a soap actor because he was a bit dull or where her netball team won their first league match 25 - 4 and played at the Manchester Velodrome, It's so exciting to watch my little girl spread her wings, blossom and win at life.

Even though she has a rich, busy and exciting life, Megan always has time for her family, which I think is the one of her most wonderful qualities.  I am so grateful to have such a close and loving family around me.

So happy birthday to my amazing daughter.  May you continue to embrace everything that life brings and may you continue to make your beautiful, Megan shaped mark on the world.  You make it a better place.

How becoming a mother shaped my life - Happy Birthday Joe x

My eldest child Joe is 26 years old today.  The little boy I raised is now a man.  A man that I am proud to call my son.

When I gave birth to Joe, I was little more than a child myself.  A teenager with no direction, floundering through life making a series of mistakes and bad judgments.  But having Joe gave me the incentive and the strength I needed to grow up and to heal myself, in order to become someone worthy of being his mother. He made me whole for the first time, giving me purpose and making me want more for myself and for him.  That tiny 7 lb 1 oz baby saved me.

Over the years my son has taught me many things about myself, about life and about parenthood.  We didn't always have it easy, but together we muddled through as best we knew how.  Sometimes I look back and wish that Joe could have enjoyed the charmed existence that his little brother Freddy has now. But the journey we took back then has made us the people we are today.  And who we are today has been shaped by everything we experienced together.

I do have regrets about my past, but I wouldn't change a single thing, because anything done differently would have altered the path that I ultimately took.  The path that has lead me to who and what I am today.  The path that has blessed me with five incredible children along with the richness they have brought into my world.  The path that gave my children the most amazing father they could have ever wished for.  The path that has given them a mother who is hopefully, in their eyes, worthy of that title. The path that has lead my son Joe to become an amazing man with his own beautiful family, a promising career and a sense of humour that never ceases to make me smile.

Joe is a man I am proud to call my son.  The father of my first born grandchild.  Big brother to the girls and Freddy. A man who I have watched grow as a person, learning from his mistakes and evolving into a more responsible, hard working, loving, hilariously funny, unique human being with a passion for cars, computer gaming, playing football and for providing for his family.

Joe, I love you.

Happy birthday son xxx

How my kids keep making me proud - a new job and starting university

Last weekend, we packed up the car and drove to Manchester, the city that Ella will be calling home for the next three years.  With a car laden with bags of clothes, shoes, kitchen equipment and of course Ella's guitar, we headed up the M6 to our destination.  We were all a bit unsure about how the day would pan out and Freddy had been quite over emotional about losing his sister and having his family change.  In fact, we had seen some epic meltdowns over the smallest things, which is not like him at all.  But we tried to keep things light and have fun, stopping for some breakfast at the services and having an in car picnic en route!

We arrived in good time and found the campus. The brand new university building with its adjoining townhouse accommodation was an impressive sight. Although all the building work and landscaping was not completely finished, and although there had been some issues over allocating housing to students because of this, seeing the place put our minds at rest.  Once it is completely finished the place will be quite spectacular!

Ella was lucky enough to get her choice of accommodation in a lovely townhouse.  We were impressed that the university had a team of helpers on hand to advise arriving students on what to do, plus there were porters to help transport the loads of luggage from the car to her door.  Fantastic service!

The accommodation itself was lovely.  Ella has a fully furnished room with a desk, wardrobe, shelving, drawers and a large 3/4 bed.  She shares a shower room and toilet with the room next door and shares a huge kitchen/living area with her eleven flatmates.  With three full sized fridge freezers, two full size fitted ovens, two microwaves, two full sink units, toasters, kettles and a load of storage space, there is plenty of room for everyone to cook.  The living space has sofas, a big, wall mounted TV and a massive round table and seating.  It is more like a holiday home than student digs.

Megan came across to give us a hand moving Ella in, as she has made Manchester her home after graduating.  As ever it was lovely seeing her and catching up on all her news.  Megan took a career break earlier this year to try her hand in the world of film and TV.  In six months she had worked on two shorts (one starring some bloke off of Corrie, which made my mum' day), one feature film starring John Hurt (in which both Megan and Ella had roles as extras) and a CBBC series.  It was a real adventure for her, but the 14 hour days, extreme pressure and the hierarchy of the industry made her realise that, although a great experience, it wouldn't cut it as a career choice for her.  So Megan set about returning to the corporate world and quickly was approached by the biggest digital marketing agency in the UK who offered her a job there and then.  She starts in October!  I'm so very proud of her.

Once we had moved Ella's stuff into the townhouse, we took the 10 minute walk to the main university complex and enjoyed a vegan lunch at Falafel, a delicious and healthy fast food outlet serving freshly cooked falafel in a pitta wrap with salad, hummus, tahini and chilli sauce.  One of the perks of city life is the choice of fabulous world food on your doorstep!  While Ian and Freddy had a play in the park next to the university, my girls and I went for a wander to check out the student union and pick up Ella's Fresher's wristband and help her find her bearings in her new hometown.

A quick spot of shopping at the huge Asda, which is a short walk from Ella's campus, and we had done everything we had to do.  I didn't plan how or when we would leave, nor did I want to think about it in case I cried and upset Ella, but it actually ended up so easy.  When we got back to Ella's house, her flatmates were chatting and getting to know each other and it was the most natural thing in the world for Ella to join in their conversation.  Gone was my timid little girl and in her place was a confident young woman, eager to start this new chapter in her life.  My heart swelled with love and pride as we said our good-byes.  It was like she belonged there and it would be the making of her. Yes, I shed a tear, but not because I was sad, but because I was so bloody proud and happy for my little girl being given this chance to shine.

As we drove away from Manchester, with my slightly smaller family, Freddy started talking about why he had been so upset over the last couple of days before Ella left.  He told us that he hadn't understood what university was.  He thought Ella was going to "another country with glowing floors and shiny walls" and that he wouldn't be able to see her.  However, he said that after seeing where she was living he now knew that it was "just normal" and that Ella would be OK.  In that instant, my calm, loving, well behaved little boy returned and all was good with the world once again.

Now, a few days since Ella left home, I've talked everyday by either phone, text or Skype to both of my girls and I've been enjoying Facebook updates and photographs of Ella's student antics.  She has embraced student life and has some wonderful flatmates.  There have been big nights out and impromptu house parties.  She is making the most of this opportunity and I could not be more proud! Having my third chick fly the nest has not left me bereft at all. My heart isn't emptier it's fuller and bursting with love for them all. My life feels even richer now, knowing I have another grown up child, doing me proud and making their mark. This is what being a mum is all about, raising kids to become confident, happy and fulfilled adults, and right now I am feeling pretty damn content about my life, watching my three big kids forge their own paths in the big wide world.

Saying Goodbye to Ella - Finding My New Normal

When I think back to when Ella was a baby, I conjure up wonderful images of a delicate, golden haired child with an open and engaging smile that radiated beauty and warmth, lighting up any room.  Now she is 18, her smile still has the same effect.  Ella shines with a glow that quite literally lights up our lives. 

Ella was born at a time when I was still reeling from the devastation of losing my eldest sister.  Before she died, I told her that I was pregnant and that my baby girl would have her name as her middle name.  I'm so glad she knew, even though she never got to meet her niece.  It was so hard knowing that I had created a new life as my sister's life was ebbing away, but carrying a new baby brought me some comfort and I felt that a part of my sister, some of her spark, had become a part of my unborn child.

This weekend, Ella will be leaving to go to university, and left behind will be an Ella shaped hole.  However, we will be filling that hole with our pride and love and giving Ella all our support and positive energy as she embarks on this big adventure.

She has grown up to be a most wonderful daughter and an amazing friend to me and to her siblings.  She is such a calming influence on everyone and she possesses such natural empathy that she knows exactly what to do and say in any situation.  Her little brother Freddy and sister Kizzy adore her and are going to miss their big sister dreadfully. I have never seen siblings as close and the bond shared between them is something very special and so precious.

Ella will be studying Criminology and Psychology in Manchester, the city that my eldest daughter Megan has made her home.  It's such a comfort for me to know that my girls will be near each other and there for each other. As a family, we love Manchester and fully intend to make many visits to see both of our grown-up girls. 

As Ella forges her path into the big wide world, I will have to become accustomed to a whole new normal. We've enjoyed some wonderful quality time together these last few weeks, shopping, lunching and watching trashy films before doing the afternoon school run together.  It's been lovely for me to have her around.  She is great company.

  Ella is my third child to fly the nest and I will be left with just two of my little chicks living at home. I'm sure the house will feel disproportionately quieter and emptier without Ella in it.  I'll miss the sound of her singing and  playing the guitar (thank goodness for her YouTube channel) and I'll miss spending the evenings watching and discussing our favourite TV shows together. (Although we do have some Skype plans in place for the season finales of our favourite shows!)   However, knowing that Ella will be making a brand new life for herself is just so exciting.  I want her to grow her wings and fly out into the world of opportunities and fulfill her potential. I know how much fun and how many adventures lie in store for her. It's just that I will miss her...that's all.

I'm sure it will take me longer to adapt to my new normal than it takes Ella to adapt to student life, but I know that we all have so much to look forward to.  This is yet another step on our family journey and I couldn't be prouder of having such an intelligent, beautiful, loving and talented daughter.

"Good luck Ella.  You have done us all proud and we adore you.  Go rock Manchester!"

Embrace Every Moment With Your Children #PowerofSoft

From the very moment that your newborn infant is lifted onto your chest in the delivery room, the feel of your child's soft, warm skin against yours, pushes aside all memories of the pain and discomfort of labour.  A cuddle is such a beautiful and magical thing.

Those early days with a baby are wonderful but exhaustingly hard.  Sleepless nights create a tiredness that consumes you mentally and physically, but holding your child in your arms makes it all worthwhile, even at 3am. Snuggling them close and breathing in the scent of your newborn is the perfect reward for the seemingly endless rounds of feeding, changing, burping, bathing and washing that comes with early motherhood. I'll never forget those super soft early cuddles that saw me through those long days of being a new mum.

And as our children grow up, the power of precious cuddles need not diminish.  Clumsy toddler hugs, with chubby arms around your neck and sloppy kisses planted on your face are simply perfect.  Sat together on the sofa, cuddled up watching Peppa Pig is a wonderful way to enjoy some closeness with an otherwise boisterous pre-schooler.  These hugs are all utterly priceless and each and everyone of these beautiful moments can be treasured for a lifetime.  Memories of soft skin and love-filled hugs can see you through even the darkest times.  Sharing that closeness and knowing that you love and are loved in equal measure is, for me, what family is all about.

The time spent with little ones flies by so quickly.  The moments between them being completely dependent on you for their every need to them becoming little people in their own right are fleeting. You can never get back that time, but you can embrace those precious moments and never stop letting your children know just how much they are loved.  However busy you are, you can always find time for a hug.

I have been blessed with five wonderful children and have enjoyed a lifetime of cuddles from each and every one of them.  Freddy is my youngest and my last born child, and I treasure the cuddles he gives me. Now he is at school, the time I spend with him has lessened, but he always gets a kiss and a hug as I say good-bye to him in the classroom. If he wakes up in the night and creeps into bed with us, I enjoy snuggling him up against me, feeling his warmth as he cuddles close.  One day, he won't need to seek out the comfort of mummy and daddy's bed when he wakes up, but while he does, there will always be a place for him between us.

Being close to all of my children, even the grown-up ones, is part of who we are.  We still hug, we still snuggle up to watch a film together, we still enjoy the closeness of a cuddle.  It's no surprise that we enjoy a loving relationship with each other, because even now I still love a cuddle with my own parents and never fail to jump up to give them a hug when I see them.  I love to embrace every moment and let my loved ones know just how treasured they are and just how special a place they hold in my heart.

With my third child, Ella about to fly the nest, I know only too well that our children are ours alone for a very short time.  As they spread their wings and fly, I look at my children with such utter pride and I know that they feel utterly and unconditionally loved, giving them the strength and confidence that they need to forge their own paths in the big wide world.  And I know that however old they are, they will always be hugged and cuddled whenever I see them!  For me, cuddles are not reserved for the littlest members of the family, they are for everyone.

***

After listening to mums across the UK Fairy Non Bio has discovered that parents hold their children's pre-school moments as some of their most treasured memories.  25% of mums confessed to missing their child's super soft kisses and cuddles after they start school, so Fairy want to remind us to give our kids an extra big cuddle today!

Fairy Non-Bio are encouraging mums to embrace the Power of Soft and to make the most of every special moment with this moving video entitled "The Softest They'll Ever Be".


           

www.softeningyourworld.com/fairy-non-bio

I have been recompensed for this post but I have retained full editorial integrity.

Parenting Teens - Saying Good-Bye

When it comes to my older children's friends, I have always adopted an open door policy in my home. Friends are more than welcome to come over anytime and I love knowing that my children can enjoy their friendships in the safety and comfort of their own home. Here they can enjoy being fed and watered and make use of the technology and entertainment available. Ian and I are very easygoing parents, and believe in giving teenagers the trust and respect they deserve. We don't see the need for setting rules like some parents do.  I remember one of Megan's boyfriend's mums telling me that I had to enforce an 'open bedroom door' and 'one-foot-on-the-floor-at-all-times' policy when they were together. At first I thought she was joking, but sadly she was deadly serious.  I had to agree to disagree with her thought process.  Treating young adults in a way that says 'you are not trusted' and 'I disapprove of what you do' is counterproductive in my eyes. I prefer to equip them with the tools to make good decisions, give them the confidence to do what is right for them and keep the channels of communication open. Stifling freedom and projecting a lack of trust only leads to deceit, secrets and resentment. I want open, loving, mutually respectful relationships with my kids, and so far my parenting techniques have proven pretty successful!

Over the years I have got to know lots of lovely young adults who have enjoyed the McDonald house hospitality and it's been a real honour to be a part of their lives.  Being older teenagers, I don't feel responsible for them in the way I am with younger children.  It is quite liberating to get to know them as people in the own rights, rather than being just your child's friend.  I have found this element of parenting really rewarding over the years, allowing me to better understand and relate to my own kids' lives in a very natural and empathetic way.

Ella's current best friend, on-off boyfriend and regular house guest from across the years is Jake.  At 18 years old, he is the most polite, friendly, helpful, charming, well mannered lad I have ever encountered.  He is absolutely brilliant with Freddy, who calls him his best friend.  He is great company and a pleasure to have around.  Ella and Jake's friendship hasn't always been plain sailing, but they have worked hard to sort out problems they encountered and are now the cutest twosome ever.

On Monday, Jake is embarking on a much coveted placement through the Year in Industry scheme.  He is an electronics and technology whizz.  The kind of guy who can make his own apps, design robots and invent his own electronic devices.  He has won awards and his skills have proven very marketable.  I have him earmarked as the next Steve Jobs.  While I am absolutely delighted for him to have this opportunity, I admit to having a little pang of sadness knowing that he is leaving to start a new life for himself away from our hometown.  We are going to miss him dreadfully!

Jake's big adventure will take him off into the big wide world as he moves to a new city and learns to live independently as a grown-up!  Last night we had a dinner party to say good-bye.  I made him a Star Wars Millenium Falcon cake, which we brought out to the Star Wars theme tune.  It was a fun evening, but good-byes are always hard.  However happy you are for someone when they get the opportunity to better themselves and do something exciting, you can't help but think about what you will be missing.  And we will be missing him a lot.

In a few weeks time it will be Ella's turn to step out into the big wide world as she embarks on her own adventure.  She'll be off to university to study a subject that she is passionate about. My beautiful little Ella will be taking a huge leap into her future.  I'm so excited for her, but our home will be so much emptier without her in it.  She is a shining light in my life, and I know she will shine brighter still as she enters the next phase of her life.  She has so much to give and is a beautiful person inside and out.

Thankfully we have the internet and all its ways of staying in touch through social media and Skype, and we fully intend to be regular visitors to see Ella at university and enjoy days out together.  (Plus the invitation for days out is extended to Jake who will only be a half hour away from Ella.)

As for Jake, it's farewell and good luck for now.  He knows he is always welcome here in his home from home and I can always knock up a Millennium Falcon cake anytime!  As for Ella, I intend to make the most of these last few weeks before she spreads her wings and flies into adulthood! I'm not going to dwell on her leaving yet, there is still too much Ella time to be cherished!

I am so proud of them both. In a society that throws scorn on teenagers, this pair are a shining example of just how amazing young people can be. I love them to bits.

It is an honour to see young people grow up and become the adults they are destined to be. I am so happy for them to be embarking on their new adventures, but saying good-bye is such a hard part of parenting teens.

Freddy is 5 Today!

It was 5.56pm on July 9th 2009 that I gave birth to my son Freddy.  Weighing in at 9lb 10oz, this little boy was destined to bring a whole new dimension of love and joy into our hearts.  With three doting big sisters and a big brother, he has been surrounded by affection and attention from the very start.  We have seen him develop into a beautiful, confident, outgoing little lad, overcoming every hurdle with his determined spirit.  He makes us laugh with his cheeky sense of humour, entertains us with his singing and dancing and fills our days with laughter, pride and fun.  

He loves watching videos on YouTube (he knows the words to Dumb Ways to Die in both English and Italian).  He likes Nerf Guns, wooden swords and water pistols.  He enjoys Wii Sport boxing and playing Plants vs Zombies on my phone.  He likes his sandpit, swing and slide and playing out doors. His love of strawberries, grapes, egg whites, cheese pizza, tomato soup and porridge stops me worrying about how fussy he is when it comes to eating a hot meal at dinnertime  His reading, writing and drawing skills have just taken off after a very slow start (my age and experience has taught me not to worry - he'll get there in his own time!) Freddy loves to join in with things and makes friends with other children wherever we go. He loves to snuggle with me in my bed in the mornings and the feel of his soft hair against my cheek, as he nestles close to me, remains one of my favourite moments of the day.

Having a child in my forties, I worried about whether I'd be able to keep up with him, but this boy keeps me young at heart and on my toes. He has reminded me of what is important in my life, has taught me so much about myself and has consequently given me a more relaxed outlook on things.  He is an absolute blessing and I am eternally grateful that I get to be his mummy!

Happy 5th birthday to my little man!

Happy Birthday to My Beautiful Mum

I have a beautiful mum.  Quite literally, she was and still is a beautiful woman, both inside and out.  She is one of the strongest women I have ever known, although she probably wouldn't think that of herself.  She underestimates her strengths and fails to see just how amazing she is.  But I can quite clearly see how brilliant my mum is and how proud I am to be her daughter.

 My mum was born in 1933, so is eighty years old today.  She is as strong as an ox and in excellent health.  Her dress sense is inspirational and puts me to shame.  Colour co-ordination, layering and accessorising come second nature to my fashionable mum.  She always looks fabulous whether she is dressed up or in her rather trendy jeans.  She will be an octogenarian style icon for sure!

I love that my mum has embraced social media so that she can stay in touch with her grandchildren and find out what they are all getting up to on Facebook.  She truly is a silver surfer!  She is a regular reader of my blog and leaves me brilliant comments which never fail to make me smile.  Although she doubts her technical ability, I think it is great that she uses her computer, surfs the web, enters competitions and sends Facebook messages.  Sometimes it goes a little bit wrong and a comment will go in the wrong place or a private message will appear in everyone's newsfeed, but that simply adds to the charm.

My mum has thirteen grandchildren and two great grandsons.  She is a brilliant Nan to my children, who absolutely adore her.  She revels in her role as a grandparent making cakes, knitting blankets and reading stories.  She does a top job.

Although she is a very demure lady who minds her P & Q's in public, my mum has an obsession with films filled with violence, blood, guts and gore.  The more brutal the better.  I Spit on Your Grave and Deathwish rate among her favourites. But she also loves her soaps and Downton Abbey and Strictly.  I love that complete contrast in her personality!

I am closer to my mum nowadays than I have ever been before and for that I am eternally grateful.  I love spending time with her, chatting, gossiping and laughing.  I wouldn't swap our time together for the world. We get on so well.  My current relationship with my mum makes me feel valued, loved and respected.  This is the ultimate gift a mother can give to her child, giving her daughter self belief and self worth.  Even at my age I want to feel validated by my mother's love, and I am blessed to have that.

So thank you mum for everything.  Happy 80th birthday.  I hope that when I am your age I am as strong, as well loved, as fashionable, as down-with-the-kids, as open to new things, as full of surprises, as happy and as passionate about life as you are.  I love you xxx

'The Motherhood' Rap

If you are a mum, you will relate to this video!  "The Motherhood" is a sharp witted rap about the trials and tribulations of being a mum.  The humour is extremely well observed and has a refreshing frankness that had me nodding my head in agreement more than once!

As mums we all live in the 'hood' with our 'babes' where we wipe noses, clean up sick, eat leftover food, rake nits, do school runs and bake fairy cakes, having given up our bodies, often compromising on our style and losing a lot of our pre-baby freedom.  The clever wording definitely seems to understand and convey the life of a mum! This rap both celebrates motherhood and sympathises with some of the things us mums have to go through such as sleepless nights, doctor's queues, expressing milk and having episiotomies!  It is a no-holds barred account of motherhood.

This really is a funny video that speaks volumes to me as a mum.  I particularly love the line "I'm flooding up your timeline with my baby news" ... guilty as charged!  And when my grandson is born I'll have even more baby related posts and photos to share across social media so watch out! 

The kids in the video are really cute little scene stealers.  The little boy pours a pot of fromage frais into his mum's laptop in one scene in the video.  This is something that is all too often an almost reality in my house.  Just last week we had an orange juice spilled into Ian's work laptop - oops!

This is an engaging and very funny video with attitude that really does tell it how it is.  It's well worth a watch!

Brought to you  in conjunction with the Fiat 500

What is a Daughter?

A daughter is a little girl....

...who grows up...

...to be your best friend!

Happy 21st Birthday To My Beautiful Daughter And Best Friend Megan xxx

More Than Just A Mum

I've been a mum since I was nineteen which has meant that I haven't spent much of my life being anything other than a mum...no high flying job, no travelling the world, no fortune or fame. I missed the university boat because I got pregnant.  I only had a few holidays pre-kids, and none of them involved anything adventurous or unusual.  I've not spent more than a few nights away from my children since having my first born in 1988.  Being a mother and doing things with kids has pretty much defined me for the last 24 years.  I've done 19 years of school runs and still have a further 15 years worth stretching out ahead of me.  Everything I've done has been with my mummy hat firmly planted on my head.  Don't get me wrong, I am very fond of my mummy hat and wear it with pride, but I haven't really got an identity beyond 'mummy'.

But Kate Takes 5 wants to know what else we are or were in her "More Than Just a Mum" meme.  And if Kate asks, I will tell her!

These days my body is no longer what it once was.  I don't have the time or inclination to bother with hairstyles, make-up or fashion.  But this wasn't always the case.  I wasn't always this slightly overweight, middle aged, scruffy woman who uses Batiste on her hair because there is precious little time for a morning shower. When I see those immaculately turned out women judging me for my unkempt appearance as I wear my ill fitting jeans adorned with sticky handprints, food spills and snot smears as I chase Freddy down the aisle of our local supermarket, I want to shout...."I wasn't always this way, I used to be young and glamorous and skinny and taut and perky and clean and made-up with shiny hair!  I used to shave my legs and do my nails and co-ordinate my outfits and know how to work it. I used to be HOT godammit!!"

So, there you are. That is what I was...this is what I had that had nothing to do with being a mum.  Ironically, it may have been this that contributed to me becoming pregnant back in the 80's which started my journey into motherhood in the first place...it made me quite a hit with the boys!

A Wonderful Weekend To Celebrate Family

This weekend has been really lovely.  Megan came home so Ian could fix her car using precision instruments a big hammer to knock the front of the car back into alignment and replace the broken headlights and re-attach the bumper.  It may not look pretty but she is now safely back on the road after her accident.  I was really shocked by the state of her legs following her crash.  They were purple-blue from above the knee down to her ankles, literally covered with big bruises.  Her back has been twisted and jarred and is painful but she is a tough cookie and being so positive. I am so proud of her handling this ordeal in such a mature manner.

Megan has also just been accepted to be a member of Radio Lollipop, the radio station that operates in Manchester Hospital.  She will be part of a volunteer team who works on the long stay children's wards with the kids, planning activities and chatting to parents.  She will also be presenting on the radio doing her bit as a DJ!  I'm sure it will be immensely rewarding, sometimes heartbreaking and ultimately life changing for my daughter.  She is also volunteering as an usher at the local theatre.  Her job with the charity Hand on Heart is taking her to great places, meeting famous and inspirational people and helping raise money to purchase defibrillators for schools in the UK to help prevent the deaths of young people from sudden cardiac arrest.  I am really proud of the contribution she is making to the community and know she will go on to great things.

At The Salford Business Expo With The Aptly
 Named Manchester Giants Basketball Team.

Meanwhile, Ella is flourishing at her new college, doing well in her subjects and coping with all the recent changes she has had.  On Sunday, she played at the Bandstand at The Quarry Park in Shrewsbury.  It was a very chilly but beautiful autumnal day.  Ella performed beautifully even though she was going blue with cold!  After her performance we were approached by the Principal of the college inviting Ella to perform at some future events.  He said he loved the tone of her voice and that she was very talented, which is lovely to hear!  One of the events is being held at the prestigious Severn Theatre which will be an amazing opportunity for her and a wonderfully proud moment for me and her dad.

Ella performing her songs.

After her performance we had a walk in the park and Freddy played in the play area.  It was such a lovely way to spend a Sunday afternoon.  We followed this by a well deserved lunch out before heading home.

Catch Me Daddy!

My Girls x

Here is Ella performing a cover of Read All About It:

I love weekends with the family.  I have a lot more family events to look forward to too.  I am taking Meg on a much deserved two day break to Champney's Spa later this week (thanks Parentdish!) Then we have Megan's 21st birthday family meal to celebrate which we'll be sharing with our close family.  It'll be wonderful having my loved ones all under the same roof again.

When You Can't Be There To Give A Mummy Hug...

As a parent, we want to be there when our children need us.  When Freddy falls over and hurts his knee, it's me who will dry his tears and give his sore leg a gentle rub.  If Kizzy falls out with a school friend I offer the advice that she wants to hear and let her know that regardless of what someone at school may think, I know that she is an amazing human being.  Teenagers' problems bring their own brand of parenting skills that are  needed to weather the storm, and Ella always knows that I am right here, fighting her corner and ready with a cuddle whenever she needs one.  I just want to see my babies happy, and I'll do whatever is in my power to try and make them smile again.

When your children grow up and become adults the dynamic of the relationship changes.  They leave home and start on their own paths through life.  I am no longer the first person there when my grown-up children have a problem. I may be at the end of the phone but I'm not physically there for them at that moment when they need me the most. 

Today, my 20 year old Megan had a crash on a dual carriageway in Central Manchester during rush hour on her way to work.  My poor shaken daughter was thankfully not hurt in the collision that left her car immobile in the middle of the road and smashed the front of the Volkswagen that she collided with.  I thank our lucky stars that she is safe.  We can get the car fixed.  We can pay for the damage on the other car.  As long as Megan is OK that is all that matters.

Ian went to her rescue and managed to get her car back to her house after doing a few repairs roadside, although there is a lot more work needed to get her car roadworthy again.  Meanwhile I sat at home wishing I was there to give her a cuddle and celebrate the fact that despite everything she was still in one piece.  I want to hug away the thoughts of what might have been and help her and me get through the ordeal together.  But with Freddy at nursery and the girls at school, I can't just drop everything to fly to the sides of my older children.  We have to schedule a visit which means that I am not always there when I am needed.  I can listen to my child crying down the telephone and not be able to wrap my arms around them.  It is not easy.

My son is just nine short weeks away from becoming a dad.  It pains me to think that I won't be at his side when his baby comes into the world.  I'll be at home waiting for the phone call which will be followed by a two hour drive to get to my son and my new grandchild.  I know what an emotional, stressful and tiring time is can be following the birth of a baby, but it won't be me there if Joe needs a shoulder to cry on or some advice at 3am.  

I think it is the 'letting go' part of parenting that is proving the hardest to deal with.  Mostly I am fine and I am so proud of Megan and Joe and their achievements, their ambitions and their ability to make lives of their own.  I enjoy them being independent and love being able to visit my grown-up children and feel a  part of their new lives.  No longer in control, no longer making decisions on their behalf, but there because we love each other and want to spend time together.  It is when I know they need their mum that it hurts me to not be there. 

Today on Facebook, a very wise and lovely friend said something in response to a conversation I was having regarding having grown-up children who need us when we can't be with them.  She has been through the same thing and understood exactly how I was feeling.  She said:

It is horrible, but at least they know we'd like nothing more than to give them that mummy hug xx

As long as my kids agree with that statement, I know I've done my job.

Blogging For One Mums

ONE are not a charity, all they want is your voice. 

ONE is a non-partisan advocacy organization dedicated to the fight against extreme poverty and preventable disease, particularly in Africa. Backed by more than 3 million members, they work with government leaders to support proven, cost-effective solutions to save lives and help build sustainable futures.

Michelle from Mummy From The Heart has made the trip to Ethiopia with 11 other bloggers to highlight the success of recent projects and remind us all why it's so important that the support is continued.  Pop along to her blog to find out more about her incredible journey. 

To help spread the word in the blogging community, Clare, from Seasider In The City, has devised a meme. Taking the first letters from ONEMums create an acrostic poem to explain what being a mum means to you.


One thing in my life that makes me feel like I have achieved something amazing
Nothing will ever be as important, as fulfilling or as validating
Everything that defines me
My gift to the world, my blessing, my joy
Undeniably challenging but totally fulfilling
More wonderful than I could have ever imagined
Seeing my children become the best version of themselves that they can be


The follow the work of ONE using the hashtags #ONEMums #ONEMoms on Twitter.

If you only do one thing today then make sure you add your voice to the ONE Campaign by signing up below.

Celebrate Their Success #PGRaisingOlympians

I can only imagine how the mums of the sportsmen and women in Team GB must be feeling right now, knowing that in a few short weeks their children will be competing in the Olympics.  Being watched by a global audience of millions, this will be their opportunity to show the world what they can do.  A culmination of years of being nurtured to become the best they can be.

Our children won't all become Olympic athletes, but each and every one of our children will have their own unique dreams and ambitions that they will strive to achieve, and it is our job as parents to support them, cheer them on and be proud of their achievements.

Being a mum of five means I have had plenty of moments where my heart has swelled with pride at the achievements of my children.  From the moment that each of them were born, every milestone has been celebrated.  I have always tried my best to encouragement them and facilitate them with what they needed to succeed in what they were setting out to do.  Whether that meant putting a spoon in their chubby hands for them to take their first independent spoonful of baby rice, or helping them to put together an application for university, I have relished my role.   I feel so honoured in that I get to help my children become the best version of themselves that they can be.  I won't take credit for their success, but to know I played a part is a humbling experience and one of the most amazing aspects of being a parent.

P & G have made eight documentary style videos of a selection of Olympic Mums talking about their children who will be competing in London this summer.  They are really emotional and I shed a tear or two, especially at the mother of Paralympian Ben Rushgrove talking about her son's achievements.

My children have all filled me with pride so many times, but I want to share a few of the achievements of my older children here in this post.  You won't find any tales of Olympic Gold, but all my kids are winners in so many other ways.

Megan is just 20 years old. Within the last month she has graduated from the University of Manchester with a 2:1 in Business Marketing and Management.  With her heights set high she began job hunting and has already been offered a position as a Marketing Executive for a company specialising in healthcare.  With a job offer under her belt, she has found a swanky and modern flat in the city centre that she will be sharing with her equally motivated and ambitious friend Abi as they embark on their new life as a couple of young professionals in a vibrant and exciting city.  The possibilities are endless and I am so immensely proud that Megan has the tools and the go-getting personality to achieve exactly what she wants to achieve in life.  Plus, she still phones her mum everyday!

Megan and Ella

Ella has just finished her GCSEs and got herself a place in a really impressive college to study her A'Levels.  She wants to improve her education by studying subjects which were not on offer at the local school sixth form.  So she is prepared to travel for an hour on the bus twice a day to achieve her goal.  Given that she sometimes struggles with change, this is a massive step for her and I am so proud that she is thinking to the future and creating opportunities for herself.  And she continues to be a wonderful musician, sharing her love of music with her friends and family which brings so much joy to us all.

My eldest son Joe's attitude to his job and his desire to succeed in the workplace has always impressed me and made me proud.  He never wanted to take the academic route through life and has instead worked his way up the employment ladder using his personality and his determination to his advantage.  And now he is about to become a dad he has really buckled down and made some 'grown-up' decisions to better the life of his family.  A couple of weeks ago he moved house to provide a better home for his girlfriend, himself and for their baby.  He has stepped up to the mark like a real man.   His girlfriend is suffering with terrible sickness in her pregnancy which is not improving.  They are not having an easy time at all but they are coping admirably through a difficult phase in their lives.  My once little boy and my first born son has done me so proud!

Having Fun In Joe's New House

I will always be the number one fan and most tireless supporter of my children's endeavours.  I will be cheering them on from the virtual sidelines of their lives giving them whatever I can to help them succeed.  I will provide love, support, advice and practical help at every step.  Even as my eldest three children become the amazing adults they were always destined to become, my role as their mother does not diminish.  Instead it evolves as I see my children taking on new responsibilities, achieving new goals and planning their own futures.  I am as proud of them now as I have always been.

I love that at the same time that I am preparing my youngest child, 3 year old Freddy, for his next big adventure in life and taking pride in his pre-school milestones, I can also help my eldest son prepare to be a parent himself.  And as 9 year old Kizzy receives yet another glowing report at school, I can also witness my eldest daughter graduate with honours.  I love being a mum to my five children and I am so proud as I celebrate their successes!

This is my entry for the #PGRaisingOlympians Celebrate Their Success Linky, sponsored by P&G.

Why I Love Being A Mum #project 52

Home made Mother's Day cards from my kids.

Homemade Strawberry and Cream Sponge.

Four out of my five kids were home with me and I had a phonecall from my eldest son who told me he thought about me all day every day and not just on Mother's Day.

I enjoyed a day of fun, laughter, music, movies and love.  What more could I ask for?

I know that I am so lucky to be a mum and I count my blessings everyday.

This is one of the first posts I wrote as a blogger "Being A Mother..." This is the role that has defined me for my entire adult life and will continue to do so for evermore.  A role that I am proud, honoured and humbled to fulfil.