What Fred Said about Music and his Family Easter

Freddy requested some music for us to listen to in the car:

Me: "Freddy you've got such good taste in music!

Freddy: What do you mean taste?  You listen to it not eat it!!!

***

Freddy had a fabulous Easter weekend with his brother, sisters and his nephew Ted all home, along with Ella's boyfriend Frank and Joe's fiancee Jade, His grandparents also came for Easter Sunday.

There were Easter Eggs, our Annual Eggstreme Eggstravaganza Easter Quiz, roast dinner for 12, bunny ears and some rather extreme plate spinning!!  I have honestly never laughed so much in my life!

I love Freddy to spend as much time with his three eldest siblings as possible, as they don't live  at home any more and he loves them so much. When all five of them are together I am at my happiest. We have so much fun! 

Freddy is such a lovely uncle to little Ted, looking after him, playing with him and teaching him the odd rude word!  Ella's boyfriend Frank has rapidly become Freddy's honorary bro' and he spent many hours on the trampoline with him playing games that Freddy called Sizzling Sausage, Beetroot, Scissors, the Gorilla game and Avoid the Ball.

Freddy spent the weekend saying that things were "divine" - Ella's dress, his dinner etc. - and that it was the "best Easter ever!" so he obviously had a great time too.

That was Christmas...Hello 2015!

After an absolutely wonderful Christmas surrounded by the people I love most in this world, I am now ready to face 2015 with positivity and determination.  I made a conscious decision to keep the laptop packed away over the holidays and concentrate on nothing more than having fun, making memories and enjoying the time spent with my family.

I was so happy to have all three of my grown-up children home over the holidays. Having all five of my children together is definitely one of my greatest pleasures.  It makes me feel complete. I love the dynamic of the relationships, the laughter and the love.

Adding my gorgeously cute little grandson Ted to the mix adds to the fun.  I was overjoyed this Christmas, to feel that little Ted had really bonded with his McDonald family. He was so happy and comfortable in our house, giving us hugs, saying our names and playing with us. He reminded me so much of Joe when he was a toddler, especially when he decimated the chocolate Santa tree decorations, searching for them among the baubles and proudly declaring that he had 'chocwot' every time he found one!  Ted also bonded beautifully with his Great Grandad.  Watching them having fun together was so heartwarming.  The oldest and the youngest member of the family united through the power of play!

We continued with  lots of festive family traditions this year.  From doing lots of arts and crafts activities in the run up to Christmas to baking lots of festive treats including our gingerbread house.

Choosing the tree that would be brought into our home for Christmas is a serious business and this year we found the perfect tree in our local garden centre and enjoyed a warming hot chocolate in the cafe afterwards.  We decorated it together using the baubles I have collected over the years, each one holding memories of Christmases past.  The children also get to choose a new bauble each year.  This year, Disney princesses and felt covered deer were added to the eclectic collection.

The gifts were spread out this year with a present each on Winter Solstice that paid homage to Ian's Scottish ancestry.  We bought McDonald tartan inspired presents for everyone, which included a shirt, a scarf, pyjama bottoms and a nightshirt.

As usual all the Christmas dinner prep was carried out on Christmas Eve whilst the South Park Christmas CD was played!  I also made a hearty, wholesome vegetable soup for our lunch.  Something healthy before the onslaught of Christmas Day excess.

Christmas Eve gifts included matching onesies for the girls and Minion pj's for Freddy along with a new mug for hot chocolate, slippers, Christmas pants and socks along with a new teddy to hug, all wrapped in a festively decorated box.

The kids designed a plate to leave Santa's snacks on and Freddy sprinkled reindeer dust in the garden.

Christmas stockings were left on the children's door handles ready to be discovered and brought into our king size bed in the morning to be opened.  The door to the living room was covered in wrapping paper for Freddy to burst through to discover all the goodies that Santa had delivered.

But before the unwrapping commenced we sat down to a breakfast of freshly backed croissants and Buck's Fizz to set us up for the day ahead.

My mum and dad joined us on Christmas day which was a real honour and made the day so special. They loved their presents and I managed to make my wonderful dad shed a tear or two of emotion when he opened a framed family photo montage that I made for them. I love doing nice things for my parents and sharing Christmas Day with them is right up there in those things I enjoy.

Dinner this year was a vegan feast including a homemade nut roast.  I looked at so many recipes but couldn't find any that really ticked all the boxes. So I made up my own recipe incorporating all the elements I liked, tweaking it to suit our needs.  So the Lentil, Cashew Nut and Chestnut Roast was born (recipe to follow soon.)  It was a huge hit, especially with my dad who ate tonnes of the stuff!  I served it with a vegan 'sausage' and chestnut stuffing, which was like a main course in its own right, and all the usual Christmas dinner trimmings (including vegan pigs in blankets).

This year we had a Big Christmas Challenge after dinner, which I had spent weeks working on.  It included questions on 2014, news, films, music, Christmas traditions, carols, anagrams, picture quizzes etc plus each family member wrote 5 questions based on their own 2014 experiences to test everyone on.  It was a lot of fun and kept us all busy in the post dinner lull!

We got to do Christmas all over again two days later when Joe, Jade and Ted visited for the weekend. My parents came back again too to see them all bringing four generations together under one roof. Ella's boyfriend Frank also came to stay and we enjoyed another roast dinner and even more presents.  We discovered that Frank is one of the most thoughtful gift givers ever and that he makes my daughter so happy...definitely a keeper!

Thankfully, the illness that has plagued me for the past 8 weeks did not spoil my Christmas in any way.  I battled through and refused to let it get  the better of me.  I'm still not 100% better yet, but feel revitalised and ready to take on 2015!

Christmas was definitely pretty chaotic and hectic this year, but it was tonnes of fun and filled with hundreds of happy moments that we will remember for years to come.  Family means everything to me and spending the festive season with my loved ones was a simply perfect end to the year.

How my kids keep making me proud - a new job and starting university

Last weekend, we packed up the car and drove to Manchester, the city that Ella will be calling home for the next three years.  With a car laden with bags of clothes, shoes, kitchen equipment and of course Ella's guitar, we headed up the M6 to our destination.  We were all a bit unsure about how the day would pan out and Freddy had been quite over emotional about losing his sister and having his family change.  In fact, we had seen some epic meltdowns over the smallest things, which is not like him at all.  But we tried to keep things light and have fun, stopping for some breakfast at the services and having an in car picnic en route!

We arrived in good time and found the campus. The brand new university building with its adjoining townhouse accommodation was an impressive sight. Although all the building work and landscaping was not completely finished, and although there had been some issues over allocating housing to students because of this, seeing the place put our minds at rest.  Once it is completely finished the place will be quite spectacular!

Ella was lucky enough to get her choice of accommodation in a lovely townhouse.  We were impressed that the university had a team of helpers on hand to advise arriving students on what to do, plus there were porters to help transport the loads of luggage from the car to her door.  Fantastic service!

The accommodation itself was lovely.  Ella has a fully furnished room with a desk, wardrobe, shelving, drawers and a large 3/4 bed.  She shares a shower room and toilet with the room next door and shares a huge kitchen/living area with her eleven flatmates.  With three full sized fridge freezers, two full size fitted ovens, two microwaves, two full sink units, toasters, kettles and a load of storage space, there is plenty of room for everyone to cook.  The living space has sofas, a big, wall mounted TV and a massive round table and seating.  It is more like a holiday home than student digs.

Megan came across to give us a hand moving Ella in, as she has made Manchester her home after graduating.  As ever it was lovely seeing her and catching up on all her news.  Megan took a career break earlier this year to try her hand in the world of film and TV.  In six months she had worked on two shorts (one starring some bloke off of Corrie, which made my mum' day), one feature film starring John Hurt (in which both Megan and Ella had roles as extras) and a CBBC series.  It was a real adventure for her, but the 14 hour days, extreme pressure and the hierarchy of the industry made her realise that, although a great experience, it wouldn't cut it as a career choice for her.  So Megan set about returning to the corporate world and quickly was approached by the biggest digital marketing agency in the UK who offered her a job there and then.  She starts in October!  I'm so very proud of her.

Once we had moved Ella's stuff into the townhouse, we took the 10 minute walk to the main university complex and enjoyed a vegan lunch at Falafel, a delicious and healthy fast food outlet serving freshly cooked falafel in a pitta wrap with salad, hummus, tahini and chilli sauce.  One of the perks of city life is the choice of fabulous world food on your doorstep!  While Ian and Freddy had a play in the park next to the university, my girls and I went for a wander to check out the student union and pick up Ella's Fresher's wristband and help her find her bearings in her new hometown.

A quick spot of shopping at the huge Asda, which is a short walk from Ella's campus, and we had done everything we had to do.  I didn't plan how or when we would leave, nor did I want to think about it in case I cried and upset Ella, but it actually ended up so easy.  When we got back to Ella's house, her flatmates were chatting and getting to know each other and it was the most natural thing in the world for Ella to join in their conversation.  Gone was my timid little girl and in her place was a confident young woman, eager to start this new chapter in her life.  My heart swelled with love and pride as we said our good-byes.  It was like she belonged there and it would be the making of her. Yes, I shed a tear, but not because I was sad, but because I was so bloody proud and happy for my little girl being given this chance to shine.

As we drove away from Manchester, with my slightly smaller family, Freddy started talking about why he had been so upset over the last couple of days before Ella left.  He told us that he hadn't understood what university was.  He thought Ella was going to "another country with glowing floors and shiny walls" and that he wouldn't be able to see her.  However, he said that after seeing where she was living he now knew that it was "just normal" and that Ella would be OK.  In that instant, my calm, loving, well behaved little boy returned and all was good with the world once again.

Now, a few days since Ella left home, I've talked everyday by either phone, text or Skype to both of my girls and I've been enjoying Facebook updates and photographs of Ella's student antics.  She has embraced student life and has some wonderful flatmates.  There have been big nights out and impromptu house parties.  She is making the most of this opportunity and I could not be more proud! Having my third chick fly the nest has not left me bereft at all. My heart isn't emptier it's fuller and bursting with love for them all. My life feels even richer now, knowing I have another grown up child, doing me proud and making their mark. This is what being a mum is all about, raising kids to become confident, happy and fulfilled adults, and right now I am feeling pretty damn content about my life, watching my three big kids forge their own paths in the big wide world.

Siblings - My Mum and Uncle John

Over the years I unfortunately haven't seen much of my extended family, especially since the death of my wonderful Nan Peck six years ago. So I was really thrilled to hear that my Uncle John was coming to stay with my parents and that they would be visiting us.  The last time I saw my uncle was at my Nan's funeral back in 2008, before Freddy was even born.  So we were all really looking forward to seeing him again and introducing Freddy to his Great Uncle.

It was lovely to see him!  My kids all really enjoyed his company and we chatted and reminisced.  I showed John photos of my two eldest, Joe and Megan, my niece Kate, my nephew Tom, my grandson Ted and great nephew Michael, updating him on all the family news.  Freddy proudly showed him all the certificates he had won at school and drew him some pictures to take home. He loved having a new grown-up to impress.

I took some photos of John with my family.  Taking photographs and preserving memories is so important to me, adding some updated images to my collection of family pics, so the children (and their future children) can see their own history through photos.  

I found an old picture of my mum with her little brother taken in about 1940 and compared it to the photo I took last week.  Now, seventy years on, my mum is over 80 and John is just a few years behind. But they are still that same brother and sister that sat for the photographer all those years ago, dressed in their Sunday best.

In hindsight, I wish I'd recreated the original pose, with John looking a bit cheeky and my mum having a protective arm around her little brother...definitely something to do next time!!

Brothers #Project 52

Yesterday we visited Joe and Jade in Northampton.  We took a car boot load full of stuff for the new baby and had a look at all the things they have packed away ready for the baby's arrival.  I even got to feel my little grandson kick which was wonderful!  

But the thing that made the visit so special was seeing the relationship between Freddy and his big brother.  From the moment we first saw Joe, Freddy ran up to him and Joe swept him up into his arms for a massive hug.  

They enjoyed playing on Joe's iPhone together and playing in the garden.  My boys have a lovely bond and however long it is between visits just doesn't matter as the time melts away in an instant.  Joe will be a wonderful dad to his new baby and Freddy will be a fabulous uncle to his little nephew.  I look forward to that new and exciting phase in our family dynamic.

Seeing my boys together and seeing their sibling bond was especially poignant yesterday as it was the 17th anniversary of my eldest sister's death.  I was so close to my sister.  She was my confidante and I trusted her more than anyone.  I've been thinking about her so much at the moment and missing having her in my life more than ever.  I will never stop thinking about her.

With Joe's impending wedding and the arrival of his first baby at Christmas, I know my sister would have been a big part of the proceedings.  Losing her has left a big hole in all our lives.  

However, I am so blessed with my five beautiful children, my future daughter-in-law and grandson, my absolute hero of a husband and my own parents, who I treasure.

Silent Sunday - Water Pistols

Silent Sunday #Project 52

Discovering Treasure

 

Having Fun! #Project 366 Day 18

I may be having the worst start to the New Year with illness, doctor's appointments, Ian's surgery and its aftermath, fences falling down and my tumble over the stair gate to contend with, but I just have to look at this cheeky duo to brighten my day.  

They have such fun together.  I can't help but smile.

Having Fun Together

Do You Have A Favourite Child??

According to the book, The Sibling Effect by Jeffry Kluger, 95% of parents with more than one child have a favourite and the other 5% are lying!  He says that having children is an act of genetic narcissism and we favour traits in our children that remind us of ourselves.  He cites his own childhood as evidence, with himself being his father's favourite and his brother being his mother's favourite.

My own children sometimes try to goad me into naming my favourite child.  But I can honestly say with my hand on my heart I do not have a favourite.  Clearly however, attention is given according to the child's individual requirements.  Freddy is still a baby and needs much more attention and a different kind of love to his older siblings.  That is not favouritism, that is practicality!  Younger children do need more of you and I have given that same level of commitment to all five of my children when they were babies.  My eldest two may not have had the same privileges as my youngest three have had, but they received as much of me as I could give them.

Sometimes I will feel particularly proud of one of my children because of something that has been said or done.  But feeling pride towards one of them does not diminish my feelings towards the other four.  The love I have for my children is a constant, but at any moment, the emotion I am investing in any of them will be different.  It is an organic process where my love manifests itself in a number of ways...each way just as valid as the other.  My role as a mother changes to ensure their individual needs are met. It is not based on equality or even conscious thought...it just is!

I couldn't choose.  My children are very different with unique traits that give them strong individual personalities.  Joe at 23 is my eldest, the baby that saved me.  He has always been a joker with a full on character.  He is loving and very funny.  Megan 19, is the most like me to look at.  She is feisty, strong willed, intelligent and a real go-getter with a fiercely protective, loving nature and strong moral compass.  Ella 15, is the gentle one with a spirit like sunshine.  She is self-effacing and doesn't appreciate how lovely, talented and clever she is.  Her empathy is incredible.  Kezia 9, is a comedian, an actress and a little star.  She is bright, imaginative, a little ditzy and has a head full of ideas that continually bubble out!  Freddy is 2 and a beautiful child with angelic looks.  He can be challenging and stubborn but also loving, funny and so delightful that it consumes me.  He is my last baby and a blessing to our family and a tiny version of my husband.

How could I pick one to favour?  It's like trying to chose between chocolate and cheese, the sun and the moon, rainbows or bunny rabbits!?  You get my point!  You can not compare!  None of my children have ever disappointed me for a moment.  I relish the opportunity of seeing them grow, develop and become the people they are.  I don't need to recognise myself in them to love them unconditionally.  In fact three of my children do not look like me at all...but I adore their differences and their individuality.  I made them all...they are all my greatest achievements.

At times one of my five will have tested my patience, upset me or driven me up the proverbial wall, and at that moment won't rank as highly in my affections as they do when they are demonstrating their positive attributes. That's human nature and I'm not a saint.  But that is in a constant state of flux and can change in a heart beat.
If I was absolutely forced to rate my kids and give them their own stats, my very own Tots 5 if you will, their rankings would continually fluctuate between the positions, almost definitely evening out with all five in joint first place!

I adore the different combinations of my children as they interact with each other.  From oldest to youngest, girls/boys...the relationships between them all are wonderful.  My 23 year old eldest son is taking his two younger sisters aged 19 and 15 to a concert next month in his best big bro mode.  The nurturing displayed towards Freddy by all four older kids is simply heartwarming.  The girls bond over hair and make-up.  My two boys have a real brotherly love going on.  I love it all.  Seeing the relationship that each of them has with their dad also fills me up with pride.  Similarly, the way we all are with their grandparents also swells my heart.  They are respectful, loving and genuinely embrace their role as grandchildren.  Everyone of my children has a role in our family and they are equally important.

Funnily enough I do have favourite nephews and nieces, favourite friends and favourite family members.  So I am perfectly capable of judging loved ones and deciding who I like best.  So I am not above being judgmental!  But it's different with my own children...I really can't decide.  There are too many variables...and I wouldn't have it any other way!  If they were quintuplets maybe it'd be easier to compare them against each other, favouring the sweet natured little angels over the whingy, little monsters...only kidding!

What are your thoughts...is Jeffry Kluger talking absolute rubbish?  Yeah that's what I thought!

The Unofficial Gallery...Big Sisters & a Trip to Manchester!

Tara is having a break from The Gallery this week so Chelle's Place is hosting this week's unofficial Gallery!

So for my entry here are two photos taken on last weekend's trip to Manchester to visit my  student daughter Megan.  She's just finished her second year university exams so we had a family day out together to celebrate.  It is always wonderful to visit her, but the one thing that really made me happy was how Freddy remembered his big sister and instantly put out his arms for a cuddle and gave her kisses. It was beautiful to see how happy they were together.  These photos show him with his two grown-up sisters Ella 15 and Megan 19.  

Silent Sunday Snooze

The excesses of Christmas caught up with 18 month old Fred and big sister 19 year old Megan x


                                                   

The Gallery...Love

When I thought about this week's theme I considered all different aspects of love.  The love I have for my husband, the love for my beautiful children.... my love of cake maybe!!  But then I thought about the love that made me most proud!  That is the love between my children.  I love how all five of my children get on so well.  I've never had to sort out a situation between warring siblings  They may have the odd squabble but it's never escalated into anything greater than that.  They are so supportive and openly affectionate with each other.  They make me proud!