Introducing Callie - the newest member of the clan

On November 5th, my son Joe and his wife Jade (from Late For Reality) made Ian and I proud grandparents for the second time with the birth of their beautiful daughter Callie.

Weighing in at just 6 lb 14 oz, Callie is an adorably tiny little girl with a spattering of dark hair and the longest toes I have ever seen on a newborn. She is content, alert and so very snuggly. Just perfect.

We couldn't be prouder of Jade and Joe and are so grateful to them both for giving us the honour of being Nana Wendy and Guitar Grandad again. Jade did an amazing job making sure that she had the birth that she wanted, showing a real strength and determination. We are equally proud of our grandson Ted who has taken his new role as big brother in his stride. He is a credit to his mummy and daddy.

Family really is everything to me, and I adore each and every one of our ever growing clan!

The Evolution of Nana Wendy

If I'm honest, I've never been much of a baby person. Yes I admit, cuddling a newborn baby is a precious experience and they do smell delicious, but they also seem so fragile and they basically sleep for most of the time. If they are not sleeping, they are feeding or pooping or crying. There may be a few magical moments in between but mostly a little baby does what little babies do 24/7. I've always preferred the toddler stage. Toddlers are feisty, interactive, robust, cheeky and full of fun. They can chatter to you, understand you and they choose if they want to spend their time with you or not! You get to see their developing personalities and build a genuine relationship with them, where love and trust will be nurtured and grown into something genuine and beautiful.

My grandson Ted is getting close to his third birthday. He is now at the age where I can really enjoy him as a little person in his own right, and not just as an extension of his mum and dad. As a baby, I saw him as my son's child, delighting in the new role my son Joe was embarking on, which filled me with such immense pride. My own connection with Ted was through Joe, and amazing as that was, I felt slightly on the periphery, looking in on this miracle unfolding in my son's life. We live too far away to have been able to be a permanent feature in Ted's early days, so my grandparenting was done remotely rather than being hands on. Every time we visited, I'd look for a sign that he remembered me or knew who I was, forever hoping that the family bond would grow even in my absence.

I spent this weekend with my son Joe, his fiance Jade and my grandson Ted. We visited Alton Towers and had a fab time. Our favourite ride was the River Rapids, with all us in one of the round boats getting splashed and squirted as we whizzed through the water. It was so much fun watching Ted experience these things for the first time. On the Sunday morning I was woken up by Freddy and Ted bashing me with foam swords (little monkeys were being egged on by Joe of course!). Then at lunchtime, we all sat around the table to enjoy a family roast dinner together.

These are the days I have been waiting for, ever since the day I found out that I was going to be a gran. Ted is full on, energetic, boisterous and funny. He makes me laugh with his antics and leaves a trail of toddler-made destruction in his wake as he runs around, a little boy on a mission to explore, learn and play. He is everything I imagined and hoped my grandson could be. He may look just like his mum, but his personality is so much like his dad's in so many ways!

When he squeezes his chubby little hand into mine so we can walk along together, or when his little voice calls me Nana Wendy or he calls Ian 'Guitar Grandad', or when he says 'I love you', I just melt. He knows exactly who we all are. He enjoys being with us and his laughter and smiles are infectious. Ted told me stories, played lots of fighting games with his Daddy and his Uncle Freddy, enjoyed dressing up and having his face painted as a skeleton and generally made himself completely at home with us. He is comfortable here and he understands that we are family and we love him. This is how I dreamed grantparenthood would be and for Ted, he now knows and understands his place in our family, and realises just how adored he is.

I am honoured to be his Nana Wendy.

Celebrating National Picnic Week with Primula

With this current spell of lovely weather, nothing beats some al fresco family dining, with a picnic being the number one choice for fun, outdoor eating. From the 13th to the 21st June it is National Picnic Week, which is being proudly sponsored by Primula. Primula have a really informative Picnic Week Hub, giving families some great ideas for picnic friendly recipes, top picnic spots and for things to do. It is well worth taking a look to get some ideas if you are planning a family picnic.

Primula also sent us some goodies so we could host our own family picnic. The beauty of a picnic is that it is perfect whatever your age, so I invited the grandparents who are both in their eighties, to join me, along with 19 year old Ella (who is home from university), 12 year old Kizzy and 5 year old Freddy. We had ourselves a wonderful three generation picnic, which we all enjoyed.

There are some beautiful picnic spots to be found around the UK, but you can equally enjoy a picnic in your own back garden. All you need is a picnic blanket, family, fresh air and a spread of easy to eat picnic food and you can turn an ordinary day into something special. Picnics are also brilliant for days out - you can save a small fortune by taking your own food instead of paying theme park or zoo restaurant prices. Plus it will be so much nicer and much more fun.

The food we enjoyed was very simple and easy to get together. Picnics needn't be complicated. In fact, using food that is easy to eat with the fingers, easy to package up and that minimises mess and hassle is a bonus when eating out of doors.

Primula is a great addition to a picnic as it can be squeezed straight from the tube onto cut bread or crackers without having to use a knife to spread it. I always prefer freshly made sandwiches so this is perfect - simply squeeze and eat! Plus it is fun. Freddy squeezed Primula onto carrot sticks and even grapes as he explored different ways to enjoy the cheesy goodness.

Original Primula is a blend of Cheddar and Gouda made into a squeezable cheese, which is naturally high in protein, a source of calcium, free from artificial colours, flavours or preservatives and is gluten free. It is suitable for vegetarians and, as it is pasteurised, is safe to eat when pregnant.  It comes in a variety of flavours including one with chives, a mild Kids blend with lower salt and added calcium and a light version with 40% less fat. (There are also ham and prawn flavours for non-vegetarians.)

Nana and Grandad loved trying out the different varieties of Primula on pieces of baguette along with some yummy strawberries and grapes, carrot sticks, hummus and a delicious dessert of profiteroles. Eating together in the fresh air, laughing, chatting and spending quality time with their grandchildren made for a very lovely day. It is a simple and cheap thing to do, but the memories shared are priceless.

The picnic setting proved to be a great incentive to encourage my picky eater Freddy to tuck in. He loved the freedom and the hands on style of eating, and ate more than I've seen him eat in a long time. He enjoyed being in charge of making his own food using the Primula to make faces, love hearts or spots on his bread.

One thing I didn't realise about Primula is that a proportion of the profits go to good causes, donated through the Kavli Trust to support humanitarian, research and cultural projects around the world and in local communities. In 2012, £2.5 million was donated to good causes.  This is just one more good reason to buy Primula.

Find out more about the Primula brand, the Kavli Trust, the product range and also visit the Primula Picnic Hub at www.primula.co.uk.

I hope you all get to enjoy many lovely family picnics over the summer!

That was Christmas...Hello 2015!

After an absolutely wonderful Christmas surrounded by the people I love most in this world, I am now ready to face 2015 with positivity and determination.  I made a conscious decision to keep the laptop packed away over the holidays and concentrate on nothing more than having fun, making memories and enjoying the time spent with my family.

I was so happy to have all three of my grown-up children home over the holidays. Having all five of my children together is definitely one of my greatest pleasures.  It makes me feel complete. I love the dynamic of the relationships, the laughter and the love.

Adding my gorgeously cute little grandson Ted to the mix adds to the fun.  I was overjoyed this Christmas, to feel that little Ted had really bonded with his McDonald family. He was so happy and comfortable in our house, giving us hugs, saying our names and playing with us. He reminded me so much of Joe when he was a toddler, especially when he decimated the chocolate Santa tree decorations, searching for them among the baubles and proudly declaring that he had 'chocwot' every time he found one!  Ted also bonded beautifully with his Great Grandad.  Watching them having fun together was so heartwarming.  The oldest and the youngest member of the family united through the power of play!

We continued with  lots of festive family traditions this year.  From doing lots of arts and crafts activities in the run up to Christmas to baking lots of festive treats including our gingerbread house.

Choosing the tree that would be brought into our home for Christmas is a serious business and this year we found the perfect tree in our local garden centre and enjoyed a warming hot chocolate in the cafe afterwards.  We decorated it together using the baubles I have collected over the years, each one holding memories of Christmases past.  The children also get to choose a new bauble each year.  This year, Disney princesses and felt covered deer were added to the eclectic collection.

The gifts were spread out this year with a present each on Winter Solstice that paid homage to Ian's Scottish ancestry.  We bought McDonald tartan inspired presents for everyone, which included a shirt, a scarf, pyjama bottoms and a nightshirt.

As usual all the Christmas dinner prep was carried out on Christmas Eve whilst the South Park Christmas CD was played!  I also made a hearty, wholesome vegetable soup for our lunch.  Something healthy before the onslaught of Christmas Day excess.

Christmas Eve gifts included matching onesies for the girls and Minion pj's for Freddy along with a new mug for hot chocolate, slippers, Christmas pants and socks along with a new teddy to hug, all wrapped in a festively decorated box.

The kids designed a plate to leave Santa's snacks on and Freddy sprinkled reindeer dust in the garden.

Christmas stockings were left on the children's door handles ready to be discovered and brought into our king size bed in the morning to be opened.  The door to the living room was covered in wrapping paper for Freddy to burst through to discover all the goodies that Santa had delivered.

But before the unwrapping commenced we sat down to a breakfast of freshly backed croissants and Buck's Fizz to set us up for the day ahead.

My mum and dad joined us on Christmas day which was a real honour and made the day so special. They loved their presents and I managed to make my wonderful dad shed a tear or two of emotion when he opened a framed family photo montage that I made for them. I love doing nice things for my parents and sharing Christmas Day with them is right up there in those things I enjoy.

Dinner this year was a vegan feast including a homemade nut roast.  I looked at so many recipes but couldn't find any that really ticked all the boxes. So I made up my own recipe incorporating all the elements I liked, tweaking it to suit our needs.  So the Lentil, Cashew Nut and Chestnut Roast was born (recipe to follow soon.)  It was a huge hit, especially with my dad who ate tonnes of the stuff!  I served it with a vegan 'sausage' and chestnut stuffing, which was like a main course in its own right, and all the usual Christmas dinner trimmings (including vegan pigs in blankets).

This year we had a Big Christmas Challenge after dinner, which I had spent weeks working on.  It included questions on 2014, news, films, music, Christmas traditions, carols, anagrams, picture quizzes etc plus each family member wrote 5 questions based on their own 2014 experiences to test everyone on.  It was a lot of fun and kept us all busy in the post dinner lull!

We got to do Christmas all over again two days later when Joe, Jade and Ted visited for the weekend. My parents came back again too to see them all bringing four generations together under one roof. Ella's boyfriend Frank also came to stay and we enjoyed another roast dinner and even more presents.  We discovered that Frank is one of the most thoughtful gift givers ever and that he makes my daughter so happy...definitely a keeper!

Thankfully, the illness that has plagued me for the past 8 weeks did not spoil my Christmas in any way.  I battled through and refused to let it get  the better of me.  I'm still not 100% better yet, but feel revitalised and ready to take on 2015!

Christmas was definitely pretty chaotic and hectic this year, but it was tonnes of fun and filled with hundreds of happy moments that we will remember for years to come.  Family means everything to me and spending the festive season with my loved ones was a simply perfect end to the year.

Christmas Memories of my Nan

During my life, I have enjoyed 45 Christmases (26 of them as a mother to my own children). I have so many fond memories of my own childhood. I remember shouting down to my mum over and over again on Christmas Eve once I'd gone to bed, asking how long until morning.  Finally getting to sleep and waking up to a stocking containing a satsuma and some chocolate, at the end of my bed. Running down the stairs and finding three piles of presents in the living room for my two sisters and I (as the youngest my pile was always the biggest!!)  Opening the pressies in a flurry of excitement while my dad prepared the Brussels Sprout in the kitchen, wearing a wooly hat and drinking rum and coke from a pint glass. I vividly recall watching Top of the Pops and eating Christmas dinner on the big table that took up all of the living room's floor space.  (I also remember the year that I set fire to my Christmas cracker at the dining table when my sisters and I were messing around with a candle - oops!)

We'd sometimes have Christmas tea at my grandparents' house where we'd eat cucumber served in vinegar and sandwiches made with that ham that has orange jelly around it. Nan always put on the same spread with everything arranged in little china bowls on the kitchen table.

My Nan Peck was a pretty incredible lady who loved any excuse for a party. She was always first up on any dance floor, earning her the title of 'disco granny'. Christmas was a very special time for her because she got married to my Grandad on Christmas Day and would tell the story of their wedding day every year, remembering the roses that grew in the churchyard. We'll never know how accurate her memories were, but the story was full of colour, beauty and love, and however many times we heard it, the details did not alter and it always felt like we were hearing it for the first time.

She adored her family and once she became a great grandma to all of her many great grandchildren, she loved to indulge them at Christmastime by buying each and every one of them a bag containing five presents each, which she'd hand out in age order to the kids who waited in line to receive them and to get a big kiss from her.  She'd buy gifts all year round, storing them in a cupboard that we nicknamed Aladdin's Cave. Aladdin's Cave was so full of toys that as the kids got older, some of the gifts would not be age appropriate. My teens recall receiving toys meant for much younger kids but not once did they complain, accepting their presents graciously with a smile.  We all loved her so much!

After my Grandad died, my Nan spent many Christmases with my parents at my childhood home. These times hold some of my favourite childhood memories.

One absolutely wonderful moment that will forever live on in my memory is the year that my Nan played charades with us.  She loved her party games and charades was up there as her favourite because it gave her a moment in the spotlight. On this particular year, Nan had many moments in the spotlight. Fuelled by a couple of sherries, my wonderful Nan took to the floor to act out the names of the TV shows popular at the time. From crawling across the floor with her tongue hanging out and panting as she acted out 'Survival' to gesticulating wildly through the living room window towards the garden to act out 'Crossroads', not one of us had a clue what she was doing!  Unperturbed, she continued with even greater enthusiasm jumping around the room with such purpose and determination to get us to guess the TV shows from her clues.  When we failed to guess her charades, she'd announce that she had therefore won that round before starting straight on to the next one. It was such a funny game when done my Nan's way!!

As a young teenager, I found her antics so endearing and so hilarious. We were all laughing so hard, and sharing this joy together as a family was just perfect. I am so glad that I had been given a new camera for my Christmas present as it allowed me to snap away.  These photographs of my lovely old Nan doing what she did best are absolutely treasured records of some wonderful memories that saw my whole family united in love and laughter.

Of course, being a lady in your 70s and playing hardcore charades solidly for hours is a very tiring business and it wasn't long until Nan retired to her favourite chair to have a well deserved Christmas snooze.  This is another photo that I am so glad to have taken, showing Nan asleep in the armchair with my cat Hairbear asleep at her feet.

We lost my Nan at the ripe old age of 98, six years ago and we miss her so much, especially at Christmastime. But she has taught me to live life to the full and to enjoy everyday.  The memories I have from my childhood, made me determined to give my own children as many joyous family memories of their own and I have spent the last 26 years giving my kids the best Christmases I could manage.  I hope that in the future they will be able to look back on their own childhood Christmases with as much fondness as I look back at my own, and they will treasure the moments that they get to spend with their own grandparents.  

Merry Christmas! This post is my entry into the Tots100/Little Tikes 12 Days of Christmas competition.

Looking At My Past - An Inspirational Woman

Looking at my five children, I so often see familiar expressions and resemblances between them.  Since the birth of my grandson and my great nephew, this recognition of family traits has become even more poignant.  I look at the two new additions, a whole new branch to our family tree and I am overwhelmed by the sense of belonging and kinship, knowing that the genes we share dictate who we are and how we look.

I think it is probably due to this that I have started to look retrospectively back into my own past.  Discovering photographs that depict the people who came before me, with whom I share a bloodline.  It is an amazing feeling to study the faces of long dead relatives to see traits of myself and my children. Each of these relatives has a story to tell and I intend to document as much of their lives as I can so in the future their memories will be preserved for the generations that come after me.

Hearing the stories that my own parents remember has given the photographs so much more meaning and I am able to feel a strong connection to my past. I feel more real than I have ever felt before, knowing that my roots run deep and strong into my family's history.  This is where I came from.  These are the people that I honour with my very existence.  

Eliza Jones nee Cole

My paternal grandmother.

I remember Nan Jones, the strong woman with the Black Country accent.  We used to visit her home in Birmingham when I was a child.  It was in Mushroom Hall Road...a place that sounded like something out of a fairy story. We didn't visit much because back then, Birmingham seemed a very long way away from our home in Slough.  We didn't have a car for years and then when my dad did start driving there was no motorway like there is now.  But I do remember those occasional trips.

I remember her big pantry, her metal nutcracker shaped like a dog, her outdoor toilet and the sterilised milk she drank in her tea.  She used to sing, in a loud, operatic voice that everyone stopped in their tracks to listen to. She had a fiery relationship with my Grandad.  There was lots of dramatic shouting, but also a very deep love.  She was registered blind and fundraised for the Guide Dogs for the Blind charity.  A silver guide dog model that she had been presented for service to the charity took pride of place in her living room.  

She died on this day 29 years ago.

But there was so much more to my Nan.  She was an amazing woman who lived her life for others.  If there was a birth or a death it was Eliza who was summoned to help.  If people needed food she would feed them.  She became the carer to her brother Jack to keep him out of an institution and he lived with her and my Grandad until the day he died. She was a fiercely protective mother who never let her family go short even in the era of wartime austerity.  She worked hard and was a proud woman with inner strength and dignity and a heart of gold.

Sadly she suffered a devastating loss in her life.

Eliza had two sons born before my dad, James and John.  This photo was taken in about 1930 of my Nan and her twin boys.  It is devastating to know that both boys died at 11 months old, four days apart.  They said that the first twin died due to complications of teething and the second twin died four days later from a broken heart. We'll never know the real causes of death, but whatever it was it cruelly took the lives of the boys who could have been my uncles and my Dad's older brothers. It's hard to imagine what she must have gone through losing not one but two seemingly healthy and robust children within days of each other. This picture is the only one of Eliza and her sons and is a precious piece of my family history. It is battered and worn but thanks to the computer I have managed to salvage the image as best I can so John and James won't be forgotten.

Hop picking was a big part of life in the Black Country.  They would do it every year, the family turning out together to pick the hops for the breweries.  In this picture, Eliza is with her mum Granny Polly a woman who was known for being tyrannical and formidable. Everyone was scared of her.  She dressed all in black and wore her long hair in a thick plait that snaked down her back. She appears in a few of the photos I have unearthed and she always looks really scary.  But her cheekbones look like mine.  It's odd to see my bone structure looking back at me in photos that date back to the early part of the last century.

I remember going hop picking with my Dad and Nan one year when I was a little girl.  I got shouted at for picking flowers from a pub garden...whoops!  Nan made us fried bacon butties and I'll never forget just how crispy she made her bacon.  Apparently she dreamed of running her own cafe and was renowned for her cooking.  I only remember the bacon.

My eldest daughter's middle name is Eliza, in honour of the great grandmother she never met.  I think Megan also has a lot of my Nan's spark and drive.  Like her, she is a strong, proud woman full of character who is fiercely loyal and extremely proud.  A wonderful legacy in flesh and blood.

I am so pleased that someone took all these photos and that my family have taken care of them across the years.  They are telling me so much about my past and about the family members and their lives.  I feel so blessed to have this window to the past!

The Men In My Life

Yesterday, my baby grandson Ted had his Naming Day, a day where we came together to celebrate this new little man in our lives.  He is a lucky little boy with lots of people who love him from both sides of his family.  Both of his paternal great grandparents were there which made the day really special bringing four generations of his family together.  We had a lovely day which reminded me just how blessed I am to be surrounded by people that I love so very much. 

Seeing my own sons Freddy and Joseph together makes me so proud.  Joe always wanted a baby brother when he was younger, but instead got three younger sisters.  He was a fabulous big brother to them all, but he always hoped for another boy in the family.  It wasn't until the year that Joe left home to live with his girlfriend Jade, that Freddy came along.  But although they have never lived together, the brotherly bond is just as strong.

Now Joe has a son of his own, a new generation of McDonald men has begun.  Seeing Ian , Joe and Ted together is wonderful.  It makes us so proud that our son is now such a great dad to his boy.  Joe now understands what it is like to be a parent, and understands just how much we have always loved him.  It tightens the bond between us all.

 The best part of the day for me, was seeing my own 80 year old dad with his grandson and great grandson.  Baby Ted has been given my dad's name Stanley as his second name, which is such an honour for my dad.  It is also Joe's middle name so it is a lovely family tradition.  

Initially my dad was nervous about being there because he suffers terribly with arthritis in his legs.  But thankfully, he changed his mind when my in-laws offered to drive him down with them, saving him the two hour drive.  It was still a long day for my dad, but we looked after him, keeping him comfortable!  He was glad to have been a part of Ted's special day and relished being surrounded by his family.  Due to the distance, he doesn't get to see Joe very often, but it means the world to them both when they get together.  Beautiful memories were made which will last forever.

My family means everything to me and these Magic Moments are what makes my life worthwhile.

Gardening with Grandad #KidsGrowWild

This Father's Day, we invited my parents around for a celebratory lunch with the family.  During their visit, we shamelessly took advantage of my dad's horticultural talents and sent him into the garden with grandson Freddy to plant up some seeds using our gardening starter set received as part of the Brit Mums #KidsGrowWild campaign in conjunction with moneysupermarket.com.  It was a delight to see 4 year old Freddy and 80 year old Grandad cultivating their green fingers and having some outdoor fun together.  

With the addition of a bag of compost and a few pots, they were ready to get planting the Pansies, the mixed flowers and the Sunflowers, hoping for a pretty display of colour that will attract the bees into our garden over the summer months.
Freddy loved the feel of the soil and enjoyed scooping it into the pots with his hands, the trowel and while wearing his gardening gloves.  He explored the colours, textures and smell of the soil as he worked. It is such a wonderful, multi-sensory activity.

Once the pots were full, they were ready to plant the seeds. Grandad told Freddy all about the different seeds and how they will grow.  Freddy was taking in all the facts about flowers and what colour, shape and size they will be.  Freddy really wants the pansies to be light blue...we shall find out when they grow!

We had potted up some sunflower seeds into a small pot the week before, and they were now little seedlings ready to be planted in the big pots.  Grandad showed Freddy how to gently prick out the seedlings. He told him all about the roots and showed him how to make a hole in the soil with his thumb to gently plant the seedling in.  freddy was amazed to hear that sunflowers can grow even taller than Grandad!

Once all the seeds and seedlings were planted up in their pots, Freddy watered them using rain water we had collected in a bucket in the garden.  Freddy loves watering plants and his new watering can was a big hit.

He finished up by using the plant labels so he could remember what was planted in each pot!  

Freddy was so attached to his new gardening gloves he wore them for the rest of the afternoon! 

It was so lovely to see Freddy spend some quality time with his Grandad doing something together out of doors.  My dad loves gardening and if can pass on some of his enthusiasm and knowledge to his grandchildren it is time well spent!  They had a wonderful time pottering about, happy in each other's company.

After doing the gardening with Grandad, we all sat down to watch Dr Suess's The Lorax which is all about the importance of plants and growing seeds.  Freddy's favourite song is "Let It Grow!" which seemed very appropriate!

 “This post is an entry for BritMums’ #KidsGrowWild Challenge”

April in Pictures

Family Reflections After a Wonderful Weekend

This weekend has been hectic.  Megan and Joe, his fiance Jade and baby Ted came home to spend the weekend. My niece Kate also came to visit and my parents came over too.  We had a houseful!  It also happened to be the weekend before both mine and Ella's birthdays so it was a real celebratory family weekend.  We also had a quick visit from my sister and two of my other nieces who got to meet baby Ted for the first time, which was lovely.

During the weekend I took lots of photographs.  It is really important to me to record all these family moments.  We have four generations of our family now since the birth of baby Ted and my niece is soon going to give my parents their second great grandchild and me my first great nephew.  These are really precious times and I want to save them to look back on in the years to come.

Being a grandparent has made me feel like I have a greater responsibility to be a keeper of our family memories and to uphold our traditions. I treasure my children and the arrival of this whole new generation is exciting and wonderful.

I am currently reading The Sixty Minute Grandparent by Rob Parsons.  It is interesting to read about other people's perceptions of this new role that is thrust upon us when our children start having their own families.  The book is pretty light hearted and easy to read or dip into. The emphasis is on becoming the best grandparent you can be, in whichever way you are most comfortable.  It reminds us that our grandchildren only really want two things from us: to be loved and to know we are there for them.

Grandparents are a varied species!  Some are very hands on and play a major role in their grandchild's life.  I don't see Ted very often so I'm not a nappy changing, babysitting, disciplining, bottle making grandma.  However, what I can be is someone who can give Ted unconditional love and the promise of quality time spent together whenever I do see him.  As he gets older, this will become more and more significant to his life.  I can tell him about his dad and what he was like as a child.  I can tell him about our family and our past.  I can make him feel included and embraced, a brand new branch on our family tree.

The line in the book that really resonates with me is this one on the job description of a grandparent:

"Individuals must be loving, caring, loving, selfless, loving, accepting and loving."

I think I am definitely up for that job!

I received a copy of The Sixty Minute Grandparent by Rob parsons which is published by Hodder and Stoughton priced at £11.99.

Things Are On The Up

We have had a testing few weeks.  Firstly, Ian's operation, which was pretty brutal and left him in quite a state for the first week of his recovery, was much worse than I imagined it would be.  But possibly worse than his state of being exhausted, battered and bruised was the fact that he had to wear surgical support stockings and see-through net pants.  This post-op fashion statement made him look like an extra in a weirdly cast extra-fetish version of the Rocky Horror Picture Show.  I tried to be a sympathetic nurse but as I tended to his stitches all I could do was sing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual Transylvania" over and over in my mind.  Dealing with a doddery husband with a bag strapped to his leg has been quite interesting and given me insight into what our future together might look like.  It isn't the prettiest of futures but if it involves both me and Ian still together and still in love, then I can deal with anything!

Just as Ian began to regain a bit of his mobility and become a bit more human, it was Freddy's turn to take on the role as poorliest person in the house.  He had a bad day at nursery on Monday so we decided to cheer him up and give Ian his first jaunt out of the house by taking him for lunch.  Not our best idea.  Within minutes he had gone pale and fell prey to a very virulent tummy bug. This bug lasted until Thursday.  Ian has always been the resident expert of clearing up spilled bodily fluids as I have a very weak stomach.  Bless my poor husband as he attempted to clear up poor Fred's stomach contents, accompanied by a chorus of me gagging and wretching.  I am officially useless!  Up until this turn of events I was totally in control of the housework.  But suddenly having five loads of washing a day and no tumble dryer put pay to my organisation and the house descended into chaos.  Poor Freddy took until the weekend before he started eating again.  Poor little mite was so weak and thin by the end of it all.  But suddenly he asked for porridge.  Porridge topped with golden syrup.  Three bowlfuls later, my little boy started back on the road to full recovery.  everything else was forgotten as I watched him tuck in with gusto.

Feeling better and hugging Kizzy x

This week, things have been so much better.  Freddy is back at nursery and seems much happier.  Ian is no longer hobbled over, bent double like an old man, shuffling around the house.  He is almost back to normal except for the catheter and 4" long scar.  He has an appointment next week to check his grafts and remove the catheter and we hope everything will then be over and Ian's health will be fully restored.

 My son Joe and his girlfriend Jade have visited with Ted who delighted us all with his sunny smiles and happy demeanour.  Being a grandparent is quite simply an honour!  They have had some good news involving a tax rebate which is going to improve their financial situation significantly.  I'm so pleased for them. Life is so hard as a young couple with a new baby who are trying to work and support themselves.  They get no help from the government and really struggle to pay full rent and council tax.  This windfall couldn't have come at a better time.

Smiling at Grandad x

My eldest daughter Megan has had a fabulous holiday in Budapest with her boyfriend (whom we thoroughly approve of and think is very lovely) and returned to some very good news that she had been offered a job at a Digital Marketing Agency.  She had applied for it the week before without being qualified, was offered an interview where she was very honest about not having the experience but showed her commitment to learn and the CEO took a risk on her based on that. They are going to train her and put her through exams. So her career will shortly be taking a brand new direction leading her to places that she really wants to go.  Exciting times indeed for my go-getting girl.

Ella had a great trip to Berlin with college to practice her German (and in a stroke of good fortune avoid the sickness bug completely). Although it was very cold and snowy, she returned home fit and healthy and buzzing from her incredible adventure.

Ella at The Berlin Wall

Last night she performed in an Awards Ceremony for her Sixth Form College which I attended with Kizzy at the Severn Theatre.  When she was at her last school, I attended all the events she performed in, tolerating the lack lustre dance performers and the cringey comedy duos and the embarrassing music teacher who fronted his own jazz band to get his own 15 minutes in the limelight.  Her new college is so very different.  The students are unbelievably talented.  They had three concert grade pianists performing classical pieces by Beethoven and Chopin.  There was a lad who is playing a lead in a production of We Will Rock You who had an incredibly powerful voice.  There was an amazing arrangement of a Michael Jackson song performed acoustically which was far superior to anything I have ever heard done on X Factor or BGT.  A three piece girl, harmony group performed two songs, accompanied by one of them on guitar and they were so professional. It turned out that they had written the songs themselves too, but I did not realise this as they were so credible.  Add to this the academic awards and presentations and this college is just in a different league to her old school.  Moving Ella was definitely the right decision.  I was so proud of Ella who performed Lego House by Ed Sheeran.  She stood in the spotlight of the stage, just a little girl with her guitar and sang beautifully, with her engaging trademark smile on her face.  She was brilliant and received huge applause.  Her college principal is full of praise for Ella who isn't in with the music crowd, yet has had her talents recognized.  She is amazing!

We have exciting times to look forward to in the next few weeks too.   Megan is coming home for Easter before starting her new job, which will be wonderful.  We have our Butlins holiday coming up staying in their fancy new hotel.  Having a few days full board and with housekeeping in one of the three bedroomed appartments at the Wave Hotel is just what the doctor ordered.  Sea air and an all you can eat breakfast buffet is just what the doctor ordered!

Grandparenting for Beginners

I never really appreciated how it would feel to become a grandparent.  Having had my first born son as a 19 year old, it was always on the cards that I would be a young granny.  At 43 I have found myself taking my role in the generation shift that occurred following the birth of baby Ted.

I never doubted that my son Joe would be a wonderful dad.  He has been an amazing big brother to his four siblings, the youngest of whom is three year old Freddy.  He has grown up with little people around him and has always demonstrated the skills necessary to be a dad himself one day.  So when I got the phone call telling me that his girlfriend was pregnant, I had no concerns about his ability to care for and support his new family.

Throughout the pregnancy I shared Joe's thoughts, dreams, hopes and fears.  I was thrilled for him, knowing he was going to experience the greatest love of his life.  He didn't understand this until Ted was born.  Understanding that feeling made him understand my love for him.  A whole host of puzzle pieces fell into place, consolidating the relationship we had.  I felt such utter pride in my son knowing that he had reached this point in his life and was facing this new responsibilty with a maturity and enthusiasm that was humbling.

But what about me?  What about my new role, my new responsibilities?

Meeting that baby boy was magical.  When you have your own child you are so wrapped up in the enormity of being a parent that it consumes you.  As a grandparent, you are a step away from that.  You get to look at that child and see his place in the greater picture.  You look at that beautiful face and see reflections of the generations that have come before.  You feel wonder at the emergence of a brand new generation and feel the boundaries of your genetic immortality push further outwards.

I live two hours away from my grandson.  I don't get to see him very often, but I know he is there thriving, growing, becoming who he is destined to be.  I feel his presence in my life, as I do my older children who are no longer living here with me.  They are all a part of me.  I am a part of them.  Physical distance is never a barrier to love.

I wonder if he will 'know' me, recognise his paternal family.  See himself in our faces, our mannerisms, our quirks.  Will our morals, values and beliefs influence him, help shape his future? Will he love us?  

One thing is for certain though, my son's child is a precious gift to our family.  He has been born surrounded by loving great-grandparents, grandparents, parents, uncles and aunties.  We all have his best interests at heart and will do all we can to give this little boy the best start in life.  He is pathing the way to the future for our families.

I know that I will miss out on seeing much of my grandson's day to day life.  I know he now smiles and kicks his legs around as he watches Ben on Holly on TV.  I know he wakes up at 6am and goes to his daddy for a cuddle which makes daddy so happy before he goes to work.  I know he sits with his dad while he plays his online games, and daddy secretly hopes he will grow up to be a games geek too!  Although I don't witness these things first hand, I hear about them and share in the pleasure of my grandson's development.  I know the joy that Joe is experiencing being Ted's dad.  

I was worried before he was born that I would somehow feel jealous of his maternal grandmother who gets to see him everyday.  She lives close by and is very close to her daughter so it is only natural that she will get the lion's share of time with our grandson. She was there when he was born and is very involved in his life.  Instead, I am so glad he will have a close relationship with her, someone he can rely on, be loved by and trust.  He is a lucky lad.

The relationship he has with me will inevitably be very different.  I will be the one he sees once a month, which is how often we try to get down there.  I won't be involved in discipline, routines or everyday things as a rule.  I will however be there for the fun stuff, outings, meals out, special days and holidays.  Hopefully I will have a role in his life that brings a bit of extra colour and an opportunity to do things our way. Every moment will be cherished, that's for sure!

Grandparenting is definitely going to be a learning curve.  Learning my place, my responsibilities and my role in this little person's life.  Knowing when not to overstep the mark.  Knowing when to speak out and when to stay silent.  Hoping that this baby boy will love me and make memories with me, like my children have been privileged to do with my parents. I will  be there for him, and any future grandchildren that I am blessed with,  in any capacity that I am needed.  I feel honoured to have this opportunity and look forward to the future and how our lives will develop. I hope I live up to my own expectations. I am so looking forward to trying. 

My Son and My Grandson

Seeing my son Joe cradling his own son Ted in his arms was simply a perfect moment.  The look of love and pride on Joe's face reflected my own feelings for him that I have felt from the very first moment that I held him in my arms 24 years ago.   

Now my own son is a daddy to his own dear little boy, he finally understands the depth of emotions that we as parents feel. He now truly understands how I feel about him.  It is overwhelming to share the emotions of parenthood with your own child.  Watching him walk the path that I have walked since the day he was born.  Knowing that he would do anything for that little boy, as I would do anything for him.

As a new generation of our family is born, I feel so blessed to have my five wonderful children and my beautiful baby grandson in my life.  It's the beginning of a whole new adventure for us all.

My Son and My Grandson

Little Ted has his daddy's profile; his nose, his brow and his chin.  Looking at his lovely little face is a lot like looking at Joe's baby photos!  I can't wait to watch him grow up and see the relationship between my son and his little boy develop. I feel like I've done my job, equipping my own child to become a parent and I am just so proud of how he is coping in his new role. 

Joe As A Baby!

Little Ted is going to be surrounded by a very loving family with lots of aunties and uncles on both sides ready to lavish love and attention on him.  Freddy is so proud being an uncle.  It is wonderful to witness everyone take on their new position in the family!  Ian and I are looking forward to being grandparents to this lovely little boy, our first grandchild.  We are truly honoured to have such a wonderful family.

Kizzy, Ted and Freddy

Christmas Planning

It's hard to believe that we have reached the end of October already.  The year that has been 2012 has flown by making a myriad of memories.  With a matter of mere weeks before Christmas comes, I am starting to make mental lists to ensure we have a fabulous time as the year comes to an end.

We have spent many recent Christmases holidaying away from home, which is something we love.  We enjoy having our Christmas meals made for us, we like having a range of activities available for everyone and we like that holiday feeling adding to the togetherness of the season.  This year, because my grandson is due on the 18th December, we have decided to stay at home ready for when the call comes to tell us that the baby has been born.  So I am having to think hard and make plans to ensure we have a wonderful Christmas.  I am quite excited about having a change.

Food is a big part of our family traditions at Christmas.  We love eating the festive fayre that is available at this time of year.  Being vegetarians means that we have to be a bit more creative with our Christmas dinner but there are some traditional foods that we love as much as the next man!

Cheese and Christmas go together perfectly. There is nothing as evocative of Christmas than a cheeseboard, loaded with fabulous blue cheeses like Stilton and Shropshire Blue, alongside a smooth Brie and Camembert, a tangy goat's cheese, a traditional Cheddar and a crumbly Lancashire.  I also love Austrian smoked cheese which reminds me of being a little girl at Christmas.  It was always my favourite and my children now love it too.  Add some top quality crackers and a bunch of grapes and you have the perfect Christmas tea time treat.

A Premium Cheese Selection from Waitrose

A fruit bowl is also synonymous with Christmas.  I love buying a crate of Satsumas which still have the leaves on, making them somehow more special!  I also buy the usual assortment of apples, oranges, bananas, grapes and plums, which the kids can dip into whenever they fancy a fruity snack.  It's much healthier than having mountains of chocolates and sweets permanently accessible!

I love baking for special occasions.  At Christmas, it is wonderful to make traditional gingerbread with the children, yummy frosted cupackes and festive muffins.  It is lovely to cook together and even lovelier to enjoy the spoils of a day's baking while sat down together enjoying a Christmas family movie.

I've definitely got lots to look forward to this year and I'm excited about making my plans to ensure we enjoy lots of fun activities together.   Having my family around is what really makes Christmas special, sharing traditions and indulging in the finest festive fayre.  Plus I'm about to be a Grandma...it doesn't get much better than that!

Disclosure Policy

Grandad...I Love You!

Sometimes you take a photograph that simply sums up a relationship between two people.  I took this photograph of Freddy with his Grandad and it epitomizes what they mean to each other.  Freddy adores his Grandad and wanted to walk alongside him, helping him with his stick.  He looks so proud with his Grandad who was chatting to him as they walked.  I'm sure it wasn't easy for my dad to have a toddler 'helping', but these moments are priceless to him.  They have a wonderful relationship filled with warmth, laughter and fun. I hope that my future grandchildren love me as much as my children love my parents!

Grandad and Grandson x

This is my entry into the Hello Canvas competition over at All Baby Advice.  Follow the link to find out how you can win a 28" canvas of your favourite photograph.