My own mum had trouble conceiving. She had blocked Fallopian Tubes which needed to be opened in order for her to get pregnant. It took five years for my parents to conceive my eldest sister. Five years later they had the procedure again to conceive their second child. Then five years later, quite by chance they naturally conceived me...their little
Knowing about my mother's difficulties conceiving, I thought the same may be true of me. However, I couldn't have been more wrong.
Aged 18...New Year's Eve...pregnant.
Aged 21...Valentine's Day...pregnant
Aged 27....Judge Dredd Film Premiere and after party with free booze...pregnant
Aged 33....New Year's Eve (again)...pregnant
All these pregnancies were not exactly planned, they were more like getting lucky in a game of conceptual Russian Roulette. It was a conscious decision to not take precautions. I definitely courted the notion of getting pregnant and I did so incredibly quickly and easily. Each baby was adored from the moment they were conceived (and continue to be the most precious things in my life.)
However, with Freddy we decided to 'try' for a baby. We were both the wrong side of 40 and I was fully aware that fertility levels rapidly decline as we get older. I had been on the pill for many years but came off them when I realised they were adversely affecting my mental health. We discussed Ian having a vasectomy, but I couldn't bring myself to let him do it. It was too final and I didn't feel that my childrearing days were complete. So we thought we'd leave it to nature and have one last try. I instantly felt really panicky convincing myself I'd be infertile. I even began to talk myself out of the whole thing to avoid disappointment if I didn't fall pregnant. I started to think about how easy life would be as the other children were getting so grown-up. I had all but given up on the whole idea, finding a million and one reasons to not try at all. That would mean I'd never have to face up to not being able to conceive "at my age".
Then....there it was...two lines on the pregnancy test! I had indeed become pregnant within the first month of trying. I was in equal measure delighted and terrified. I went on to have my gorgeous baby boy and thank my lucky stars every day that I fell pregnant before fear stopped me from trying!
I am so lucky that I have never had to worry or wait to get pregnant. It really was so easy for me to conceive and each baby has been an absolute blessing. I can't imagine what my own mum went through being unable to fall pregnant naturally.
|My Freddy Bump!|
|My Baby Boy x|