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Wednesday 2 March 2011

Listography....Pet Hates

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This week's Listography subject is Pet Hates.  I was struggling with this one last night.  Maybe I'm just too mellow at the moment after reviewing the self-help hypnosis mp3!  However, as ever I refuse to be beaten by Kate's topics and I've been extra vigilant this morning and have indeed come up with my list all based on things I experienced today that really irked me!

1:  Finding toast crumbs and Marmite debris in the butter.  Why do people think the "scrape the icky stuff on the knife back into the butter" method of toast making is a good idea?  It's just eww!  

2:  Spitting in the street.  Again, just why?  On the school run I passed a charming tracksuited man complete with cigarette in one hand and dog lead in the other hock a greenie onto the pavement, just as I drove by.  It was the whole hocking process with its animated throwing back of the head  to achieve the required trajectory of the phlegm projectile that repulsed me the most.  I couldn't hear his guttural shifting of the tar ridden foreign object in his windpipe, but I could just imagine it *gags at thought*.

3:  Call Centre Phone Calls that ring off when you pick up the phone.  The ring tone mocks you as if it knows the fact you were sat relaxing, feeding your son, only to be thrown into a frantic frenzy of activity to get the call (hoping that it isn't school to tell you that your kids have been sick!)  I unlatch my disgruntled toddler, which in itself is a feat...he has vice like jaws!  I stumble over the obstacle course of abandoned toys that Fred leaves strewn across the floor.  I try to climb over the safety gate but my knee twinges painfully as I cock my leg up, so I fumble with the opening mechanism and end up bashing my thigh against the unforgiving metal surround.  I slide across the kitchen floor to grab at the phone, slightly breathless now ...just to hear the click followed by silence.  Geez thanks for that!

4:  Piles of things to go up to the bedrooms sat on the dogleg of my stairs.  The ever growing mountain that I refuse to remove now consists of Kizzy's notebooks, pencil case, two board games, a jumper and a money box.  Ella's contribution is a shopping bag containing the things I bought her last time we went shopping that she really needed!  I look at this as a social experiment...how high will they let the pile grow before they decide to transfer the objects to their rooms, or do they just consider this little bit of space as extra storage?  I don't know...good job I'm not one of those obsessively tidy women...I would've keeled over in desperation at the slovenliness of my children by now.  I may need to up my nagging though soon, before I fall over it...probably in my haste to get to one of those annoying call centre phone calls.

5:  Delivery Men that stink of cigarette smoke, whose in vehicle smoking habit taints my parcels.  I hate taking delivery of a parcel that stinks like an ashtray containing 20 B & H fag butts.  The smell lingers so long and starts to permeate my house.  I feel the same about library books which stink of cigarette smoke.  You open the book up and the stench explodes into your face.  I sniff before I borrow now!  It serves to remind me why I am so glad that they banned smoking in public buildings. People have a right to smoke if they wish, but I have a right not to have to smell their smoke!

Rant over!

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